Kevin Federline has no problem spilling all the secrets he has been holding onto in his memoir, You Thought You Knew.
In his first-ever tome, out on October 21, Federline has chronicled every aspect of his relationship with Britney Spears — including the steamy details of their first encounter, RadarOnline.com can reveal.
Federline Details His First Hookup With Spears
Federline looks back at his marriage to Spears in his memoir.
According to the 47-year-old DJ, he had no idea who the Toxic singer was until they crossed paths at the Hollywood nightclub Joseph’s in April 2004.
“We talked for a little while and then hit the dance floor,” he writes in his book. “Nothing too wild, just a little playful back and forth. Honestly, at the time, in my 25-year-old mind, I was just thinking about smashing that.”
After their first meeting, they went to the Beverly Hills Hotel, where they reportedly spent time together by the hot tub while their friends hung out in the pool. A few moments later, Spears allegedly grabbed his arm and led him into her private bungalow.
“As soon as we got into the bungalow, Britney turned around, slipped off her underwear, and started kissing me, tearing at my clothes with both hands,” Federline recalls. “We stumbled toward the bed while I struggled to kick my pants off my ankles.”
He adds: “What happened between us that night was purely physical. It felt like we were feeding off each other’s energy, caught in this whirlwind of chemistry and connection. Very passionate, very intense.”
Federline Left His Pregnant Fiancée for Spears
Federline was engaged to Shar Jackson when he met Spears.
Federline was engaged to Shar Jackson, who was pregnant with their second baby at the time, when he had an intimate first encounter with Spears.
After paparazzi sensed something was brewing between them during a beach outing, he called his pregnant fiancée and told her “about Britney, about the connection [they] had, and how [he] couldn’t ignore it.”
“I could hear the heartbreak in her voice, and the pain it caused. She was angry. But under the anger was something deeper, a sadness I couldn’t undo,” he reminisces, noting he should have told Jackson how unhappy he was in their relationship.
Federline shares in his memoir: “I let things unravel instead of facing them head-on. I told myself the distance would make things easier, but it just delayed the inevitable. By the time we spoke, it was too late. I had already let her piece together the truth on her own. The photos of Britney and me on the beach helped.”
Spears Allegedly Had a Sexual Encounter With a Female Dancer
The encounter allegedly happened during the European leg of Spears’ 2004 Onyx Tour.
The …Baby One More Time songstress was in the middle of the European leg of her 2004 Onyx Tour when Federline caught her in bed with a female dancer.
“Britney stood between her legs, hands on her face, and they were f—— going at it. Full-on making out,” Federline, who admitted to “already catching real feelings” for Spears at the time, writes in his memoir. “It was one of those moments that hits you so fast, your brain can’t even begin to process it.”
After seeing the scene, he walked out of the room to book a flight back home. However, Spears “started apologizing” and told him she had no idea how serious Federline was about their romance.
According to the dancer, Spears was “overwhelmed” and admitted it “had been a mistake.”
“It was our first fight, or whatever you want to call it. I think it was the moment she realized I wasn’t there for the fame or the perks. I was only there for her,” he continues.
Federline Reveals How He Proposed to Spears
Federline and Spears got married in September 2004.
Federline and Spears tied the knot less than three months after they began dating.
In You Thought You Knew, the You Got Served star recalled how they talked about getting engaged while they were returning to the U.S. following the European leg of Spears’ tour.
“There we were, sitting in first class, sipping cocktails, talking about life, and then – bam – she was casually, or maybe not so casually, proposing to me,” he writes. “I kind of laughed it off, played it cool, and told her no.”
They did not bring up the topic again until she suffered a knee injury in June 2004.
Federline says: “I thought about what she’d said on the plane. I kept replaying it in my head, wondering if I’d made a mistake brushing it off. By the time she was well enough to think about flying again, I finally worked up the nerve to ask her the question she’d asked me weeks earlier.”
Spears Addressed ‘Unfinished Business’ With Justin Timberlake Before Her Wedding to Federline
Spears and Justin Timberlake dated from 1999 to 2002.
Before Federline, Spears was married to Jason Alexander and briefly linked to Colin Farrell. The Womanizer singer was also in a long-term relationship with Justin Timberlake from 1999 to 2002.
The Britney & Kevin: Chaotic star claimed Spears never really got over the *NSYNC member.
Per Federline, his now-ex-wife called Timberlake on the night before their wedding to settle their “unfinished business.”
“I figured she was talking to her mom or her sister, so I went back to the room,” he reflects. “When she got back to the room, I could tell she’d been crying. She said she was talking to Justin. She said she needed to call him, to end one chapter of her life before starting a new one.”
He noted that, even after their wedding, Spears still “had not fully moved on” and that he “could see that part of her heart still had ties to [Timberlake].”
“She might’ve loved me, but there was always something there with Justin that she couldn’t let go of,” says Federline. “Being in love with someone still hanging on to someone else – you feel it, even if they don’t say it. It’s not something you can compete with.”
Spears Allegedly Slapped Federline While Holding Their Son
Spears released the memoir, ‘The Woman in Me,’ in 2023.
The patriarch recalled an incident when the Criminal songstress slapped him while she was holding their first son, Sean Preston, during an argument over his use of marijuana.
“She knew who I was. She married me, knowing it. But she was on the warpath, shouting her head off. Then she slapped me. Right in the face. With our son in her arms,” he says of the first time “things got physical.”
How Federline Learned About Their Divorce
Spears filed for divorce from Federline in November 2006.
Eight weeks after their second son, Jayden James, was born in September 2006, Spears filed for divorce from Federline citing irreconcilable differences.
The Onion Movie star revealed he was in Canada to promote his album Playing With Fire when he learned about his then-wife’s divorce filing.
“I got to the studio, went through the usual motions with producers,” he details. “I knew what to expect, another day answering the same questions, until a producer ambushed me – right before I went live on air – with: ‘How do you feel about Britney filing for divorce?’ My brain just…froze.”
They reached an initial divorce settlement in March 2007 before finalizing the divorce in July of the same year.
Federline Claimed His Sons Had Unsettling Experiences With Spears
Federline and Spears have two children together.
Federline shared the most shocking revelations about his and Britney’s children in several parts of his memoir.
In one part of his book, he claimed the mom of two gave her most attention to Jayden and neglected Preston.
“I don’t doubt she loved them both, but her actions made it clear who came first,” Federline writes. “Preston carried that pain for years. The night terrors, the need for constant reassurance, the feeling that he wasn’t loved as much as his brother — it lingered. Even as he got older and could articulate his feelings, the scars remained.”
He also alleged Britney would take Jayden to ride horses and feed him shellfish despite his severe allergies.
“Preston once told me she had punched him in the face,” Federline adds.
In addition, the Excess Baggage contestant claimed the Oops!… I Did It Again songstress forced her way into his home with “one boob hanging out of a ripped shirt” and had several “unsettling” visits with their children.
“One night, after another unsettling visit, the boys came home and said, ‘We’re done. We’re not going back,'” he shares in the book. “You could feel the tension in our house evaporate. They weren’t bouncing between two worlds anymore.”
Spears Is ‘Racing Toward’ Death
Spears’ mental health has been a widely discussed topic before and after her 2008 conservatorship.
Federline expressed his concern for Spears after she began displaying erratic behavior, admitting he fears she might face the same fate as Michael Jackson or Amy Winehouse.
“The truth is, this situation with Britney feels like it’s racing toward something irreversible… From where I sit, the clock is ticking, and we’re getting close to the eleventh hour,” he writes in his memoir.
Federline Said #FreeBritney Movement ‘Got It Wrong’
Spears said Federline’s claims are ‘extremely hurtful.’
Federline said the #FreeBritney movement “started from a good place,” but he noted how ending the conservatorship also led him to “brace for the worst.”
“The Free Britney movement got it wrong,” he adds. “All of those people who put so much effort into that should now put the same energy into the Save Britney movement. Because this is no longer about freedom. It’s about survival.”
